The short explanation
What happened to you was not okay. You deserve respectful care, and comments about your marital status or weight that are not relevant to your problem should not be part of a medical visit. Many women in India have had similar experiences, and it is understandable to feel scared to go back. Your pain still deserves attention. You can choose a different doctor or hospital. Ask friends or colleagues for recommendations of doctors known to be kind. You can also bring someone with you for support, ask for a woman doctor, and write down your symptoms in advance so you feel more in control.
What depends on your situation
The parts of this that change from woman to woman. Uncertainty is stated, not hidden.
- It is fine to say at the start, 'I had a bad experience before and I am nervous.' A good doctor will respond with patience.
- If a doctor is disrespectful, you can end the visit, ask for another doctor, or raise a complaint with the hospital or clinic management.
- Pain that is severe, getting worse or comes with fever or bleeding should not wait.
What this answer cannot determine
The boundary of online education. These need a clinician who can see you.
- This answer cannot tell what is causing your pain. A doctor you feel comfortable with needs to assess you.
Questions for your clinician
Take these with you. You can add any of them to an appointment card.
- I had a bad experience before; can you explain each step before you do it?
- What could be causing my pain?
- What tests do I need?
- Can I bring someone into the room with me?
When to seek help
Clinician-approved guidance for this topic. When in doubt, being seen is never the wrong choice.
Emergency — call 112 now
- Call 112 or go to the nearest emergency department if you have sudden severe pain, fainting or heavy bleeding.
Get help the same day
- Get care the same day if you have pain with fever or vomiting.
Book an appointment soon
- See a different doctor within a few days if your pain is ongoing.
Sources
The evidence this explanation is built on.
- Pelvic pain NHS
- Pelvic pain MedlinePlus (NIH)
Who wrote and reviewed this
Every AskHer answer names its author. A clinically reviewed answer also names the clinician who signed it off — if no clinician is named below, it has not been clinically reviewed.
- Author
- AskHer Editorial (AI-assisted draft) AskHer's editorial team — not an individual clinician Works in English, தமிழ், हिन्दी
- Clinical reviewer
- Nobody yet No clinician has signed this answer off, and no person on the editorial team has read it yet. That is what the “Written with AI assistance” label means. It is queued for an editor to read, and then for a clinician who works in this area. The sources it was drafted against are listed above.
- Review status
- Written with AI assistance — not yet reviewed by a person
- Last reviewed
- Not yet reviewed by a person
- Version
- 1
Correction history
Substantive changes are listed, not quietly edited away.
No corrections have been made since this answer was first published.
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